Being Human
by asteriskss
Summary: This is where Cas is human and he's trying to get used to it. The first order of business is to get clothes. So Dean takes him out and of course Castiel picks out some of the most inappropriate clothing. From there, Dean details the things he likes the most.
1. Semi-Offensive and Suggestive T-Shirts

It had been exactly three weeks since Castiel became human. Both Sam and Dean took turns helping him with the difficult transition. Sam taught him how to shop for food and supplies, he wanted him healthy but Dean always undid the progress with greasy unhealthy foods. Dean helped by teaching Castiel how to work on the car, how to **NOT** over drink as ironic as that sounded. He also schooled him on how to dress. You know something comfortable, flexible, and easy to fight in. What he wasn't expecting was for Castiel to venture off and collect a ton of brightly colored semi-offensive t-shirts.

Dean shook his head as he examined the t-shirt that Castiel stepped out of the dressing room wearing. This was his life now, constantly monitoring his friend because for fuck sakes, these damn shirts. "Are you kidding me?" He asked. "Do you even know what that means?"

"Dean. I wish to save a horse. They are God's creatures, innocent creatures. Also, you were once a cowboy so I can ride—"

Dean grabbed the bridges of his nose and stopped that sentence immediately. "Cas, no." He felt his cheeks go warm so he ignored the sentence Castiel almost finished. "Dude, _'save a horse, ride a cowboy_' doesn't really help the horses."

Castiel seemed somewhat disappointed. "That's unfortunate. I believed the horses were in danger."

Dean shook his head. "No but the cowboys are getting more than enough _help_." He said with a light laugh. He was trying so hard to hide how funny he really found the shirt but Sam would die when he saw it.

"I really want it, Dean."

"Hey man, go for it."

The fallen angel smiled and returned to the dressing room. "These as well, Dean, come see."

Dean sighed and followed his friend into the small room. "Alright, show me what you got."

Castiel pulled off the t-shirt he currently had on and pulled on a bright royal blue that said, '_I fucking love cuddling_' in bright white letters.

Dean snorted. And here he thought the shirts couldn't get worse. "Keep going."

Castiel tried on another. This one was red with white letters that read, '_blink if you want me_'. He wouldn't deny it but he wanted that shirt specifically because it had angel wings on the back. It was a Doctor Who shirt.

Dean laughed and pushed Castiel aside to take a seat next to the shirt. "Okay, what about the last two?"

Castiel smiled and held one of them up so Dean could read it. It said, _'Let's flip a coin. Heads I get tail. Tails I get head_'.

"Oh God, Cas." He covered his mouth but the snort couldn't be muffled. Dean grabbed the last shirt and nearly died. It was his favorite from the bunch. It said, '_mount and do me_'. "Cas, you're fucking perfect." He stood and exited the dressing room.

One of the workers was standing there and looked at the two suspiciously before saying, "one person to a room, please."

Dean nodded but made a face at her. "We're done. Sorry."

"Dean. Dean! I want more."

"Not until we go shopping again."

The woman blushed, staring at them with wide eyes. "Um, Sir! "

Dean raised a brow when he realized what she was accusing them of. "Wait! We weren't um, no. He was just showing me the shirts he picked out."

She didn't believe him until Castiel moved from behind Dean with his arms filled with t-shirts.

"Come on, Cas." He hurried past the woman and headed straight to the checkout line. Those damn employees.

* * *

Of course Castiel wanted to wear them right away. So he changed in the front seat of the impala. He unbuttoned his shirt after pulling off the trench coat then pulled on the one that made Dean smile the most; '_mount and do me_'.

Dean shook his head but there was still a smile plastered on his face. He loved Castiel lack of knowledge about the lewd side of a human's sense of humor

* * *

When they returned to the bunker, Castiel went through the shirts with Sam. To say the least, Sam liked the shirts. Or perhaps he was so stunned that it triggered a laughing fit. Dean was sure his brother was going to die of oxygen loss.

Castiel watched as the youngest Winchester fell to the floor, wheezing and snorting. He wasn't so clear on what exactly was happening.

"Relax dude. It's not that funny." Dean said as he held in a laugh of his own. The second time around was even funnier.

"'_Mount and do me_', Cas? Really? D-do—" he started laughing again before he could even finish his sentence. "Do you even k-know- hahaha- what that means?"

"That's what I asked him." Dean jumped in.

"They are pretty." Cas defended. He wasn't too concerned about the meaning of the shirts. He enjoyed them for their textures and color.

Sam covered his mouth. "And lewd."

"But pretty." Dean mocked.

Sam finally caught his breath and forced himself to his feet. He couldn't believe that Dean let him buy those shirts. "Well then, now that I've had my laugh for today, I'm going to pick up some groceries. Any requests, Dean? Mr. Mount Man?"

"Pie."

"Skittles."

Sam shook his head in disappointment. "I thought we talked about this, guys, healthy foods."

"You talked, we listened. You suggested, we declined." Dean explained.

"Fine, Mr. Clogged Artery and Mr. Heart Attack." He grabbed the keys from Dean's hand and left to pick up food. "I'll be back. Try not to have too much fun without me." He joked.

* * *

Dean was the one most comfortable with Castiel becoming human. Of course he missed having the mojo around but he noticed something even more important. Castiel looked happier, a lot happier. He was trying new things and exploring the human life. Dean loved to see that smile on his face. He enjoyed seeing those blue eyes wide with excitement and happiness. "Whoa..." He blurted out from the bed, breaking his thoughts just in time.

Castiel looked up from folding his clothes and made a face. "Dean?"

"What?"

"You said, 'whoa' and I am asking why."

"Yeah, nothing, man. I was just thinking out loud again."

Castiel blinked and returned to folding clothes like Sam showed him. "Dean?"

"Yeah?"

"I wish to buy plaid next time. Plaid is fascinating." He saw the Winchester's wear it all the time so he figured he should wear it too. Or he could just steal Dean's shirts. That would work too.


	2. Dean's T-Shirts and Sweatpants

**A/N**: Castiel finally learns how to wash clothes and expresses no regret with wearing Dean's clothes. Meanwhile, Sam begins connecting the dots that Dean and Castiel have been creating over the 8 weeks of Castiel being human.

* * *

Even though Dean didn't realize that Castiel was wearing his clothes at first, Sam sure took notice. As a matter of fact, he took notice of a lot of things that he didn't even understand how or when it happened. Castiel would come down to breakfast in t-shirts that he would be swimming in. They were loose fitting and familiar. Ah, that's right, it was Dean's. He would occasionally wear jeans that was a little too big for him. They hung low at his hips (which Dean clearly liked because that's the first place he looked). Sam put two-and-two together and came to the conclusion that they obviously belonged to Dean. So when exactly did they start sharing clothes?

He also noticed how domestic Dean and Castiel had become. Castiel would make Dean coffee every single morning as ritual. He'd put it in the same mug and do this thing where he'd run his fingers through Dean's hair as he walked away. What was up with that?

It was just how they interacted that had Sam at a loss for words.

They were sharing clothes, finishing each other's sentences, and Sam even came home to the bunker once to find them asleep on the couch together. When in the hell did Dean Winchester and Castiel become a domestic couple? Sam had no problem if they were into each other; he just wanted to know how in the world he missed them becoming a couple.

The biggest surprise of the situation was that Dean didn't even realize the changes.

* * *

It was now week 8 of Castiel being human and it was time for a new lesson; washing clothes. Sam usually did the laundry but Castiel was eager to learn so he figured he'd let his brother and the former angel have their bonding time.

It wasn't too long since Dean and Castiel arrived at the Laundromat. Dean went over the steps a few times then he would let Castiel do it on his own to learn. The entire situation was going fine until he actually took notice of his friend's attire. The former angel was dressed in a pair of black sweatpants and a forest green t-shirt that happened to belong to Dean. He wasn't sure if he should have been turned on or upset that Castiel was taking his clothes again. Either way, he appreciated how he looked in a variety of clothing. Dean didn't realize it but he had been paying a little too much attention lately to the way Castiel's body looked in everything. Surprisingly, it didn't bother Dean; he was okay with the thoughts for now. Admiring from a distance wasn't a crime right?

Castiel on the other hand didn't know what he was doing; this was all new to him. Even though Dean explained the process thoroughly he was sure that he messed up somewhere down the line. Was everything supposed to look like that? Washing clothes shouldn't have been that hard. "I am sorry, Dean." He said out into the quiet area. How was he supposed to know it would turn everything pink?

Dean snapped from his thoughts when a gravelly voice echoed throughout the Laundromat. He stood from the seats that were nailed against the wall and approached the washing machine that had Castiel apologizing. Observing the incident he sighed heavily. His AC/DC shirt was in there. "It's fine." Dean whispered, standing behind Castiel, leaning over his shoulder. "You have to sort out the colors, Cas. Put the whites with whites, denim with denim, colors with colors, darks with darks, and so on. Got it?" He explained again.

"Dean, I do not want to hurt the clothes' feelings by separating them."

Dean laughed. "I'm sure they won't mind." God Castiel was cute. "Just do it like I showed you, okay?"

Castiel turned to face Dean and it was then established how close they actually were standing. He could smell the scent of lavender and the impala rolling off of Dean's body. It was actually quite pleasant.

Dean, before speaking, placed his hands on the rim of the washing machine on either side of Castiel. "Just um, don't put red shirts in with whites because the dye from it will seep into the other clothes."

Castiel smiled and nodded. He was so eager to learn everything that Dean and Sam were teaching him. Especially Dean since he had such a hands-on approach with teaching. "I will remember that."

Dean cleared his throat and decided to back away some. Castiel seemed to have rubbed off on him with the whole personal space problem. "Okay cool, good." Things started to seem a tad bit awkward now.

"I will start the next batch."

"No red shirts buddy." He reminded as he returned to his seat against the wall.

Castiel threw all of the jeans into the washer after removing the newly dyed pink clothes he created.

Dean told him that he could wash all of the piles at once since there were so many washers and no other costumers in the place but Castiel insisted that he wanted to put love and care into each load of clothes. So Dean ended up letting him wash the clothes his way.

A few minutes had passed and another problem occurred. "Dean?" Castiel called out again.

"Yeah?"

"Are there supposed to be this many bubbles?"

Dean looked up from his magazine to the washer overflowing with soap. "Damn it, Cas." He forced himself up once again and went over to the washing machine. What did this guy do now?

"I am sorry, Dean. I am very bad at laundry."

Dean put his hand on Castiel's shoulder and smiled. "It's okay. You'll get better at it. Just remember. A cap full of the detergent and a cap full of liquid fabric softener."

Castiel nodded. "Okay, I must sort the clothes; whites with whites, denim with denim, colors with colors, darks with darks. Then insert a cap full of the detergent and a cap full of liquid fabric softener." He repeated.

Dean stared at him for a moment before grinning. "See. You got this, man. "Now help me clean up the bubbles."

* * *

Dean watched as Castiel finally made his way to the last pile. It had been three hours; three wonderful long hours of watching Castiel explore his skills with doing the laundry. "See and you thought you were going to mess up all of the clothes."

"I did well?" He asked as he started the dryer.

Dean stepped closer to his friend. "You did great." He brought his right hand up and placed it on the dryer forcing Castiel's back up against the warm metal. "Sam will be happy that he doesn't have to do all the laundry by himself now."

Castiel nodded. "I am here to assist."

Dean smirked as his gaze moved over his friend's features. Damn, what was he doing? "Yeah, Sam will appreciate that." Once again he pulled away and glanced off to the side. He was glad that Castiel hadn't caught on to what was happening between them lately because he didn't think he would be able to explain it just yet.

"Dean?"

"Yeah, Cas?"

Dean's eyes suddenly went wide when Castiel grabbed him by the collar of his shirt. He kissed him flat out on the mouth. "C-Cas?" He murmured against soft lips.

Castiel reached around and grabbed Dean's rear before giving it a gentle slap. "I learned this from the pizza man."

He must have been watching porn again.


End file.
